days since last incident: 0.

these tears i’ve been shedding the past two weeks have been because of you. i hope someday when you’ve “figured things out for yourself” you won’t push away your future love, and that you won’t take a break because of that very reason. it was only almost four months being with you, but i’ve never been happier. there is only so much love that friends and family can give someone but it is an even more amazing love to feel from someone who you can kiss and cuddle with and with.

Reblog / posted 1 day ago


i can’t pretend with you.

Work is going to be hell tonight.

That’s if anyone has a hint of realizing there’s something wrong.

But hey,

I noticed I can be funny as heck when I’m feeling extremely miserable.

He broke up with me.

"I think it’s best if we take a break."

Break? Those are for pussies. “Taking a break” should never even BE associated in the same sentence as “real relationship”.

You were my first serious relationship and now, I don’t even know if that’s how you saw it to begin with.

It hurts. It hurts so much.

Taylor’s words of wisdom for me was that she doesn’t want me to take this experience and altar the way I perceive love in future relationships.  

But I trusted you.  It is extremely hard for me to trust ANY guy and I trusted YOU. With my heart. 

But shit like this happens, right? If you can’t even express your troubles with your significant other, it’s time for a “break”, right?

Yeah, right.

The only emotion I can properly express is when I cry. But even then I do my best to hide the tears.

from falling asleep on skype video calls to talking on the phone while heading to work

your private problem has caused us to create a silence in between us

to the point of one word responses on skype

zero calls


zero texts.

i hope everything gets better.

but i honestly hope we get better.

i will always wait for you, love.

i have a thing for pearls. i found out it was my birthstone and have been fascinated by their beauty ever since. i’m slowly starting a collection of pearl necklaces but one day i’d like to own necklace or ring or bracelet of made up of real pearls.  and i’m crossing my fingers that it’d be a gift from someone special to me. i’d value and cherish it even more. 

Reblog / posted 2 weeks ago with 1 note

i met his dad today. he gave me a high five…


i feel like it was awkward for the both of us. 

but…from that i guess…he likes me?

i’m pathetic and alone. i don’t know how to properly keep relationships. i’m a burden with too much baggage. everyone is able to have fun without me anyway. i’m disposable. and once they realize how truly pathetic i am they’ll finally start to stop caring.

you know society says that i should be married with children in about 15 years. that’s scary to think about.